Gas and Laziness and Fatty Americans

One of my many #1 Rules of politics is: Look for the Fat Politician for he, (and it is usually a he, but it could be a she, unless you're in PA and you have like 16% female representation in the General Assembly) is ripe to be picked off. Several did, and several slimmer men, and just one woman, a hog rider herself, Madame Forcier.

It's a matter of walking the doors, and still being able to attend the spaghetti dinners, and chicken barbecues, and exercizing, not only the fat white bods in which most fat politicians come, but also exercizing portion control when sueying up to the buffet table, either laid out in caucus on the taxpayer dime:

For thoseof you PCN watchers out there, the floor euphemism for free food in the caucus room, taxpayer paid that is, is "Informal discussions are now going on in the caucus room, followed by formal discussions." And generally we're not talking about lunch meat and soda, but nice sternoed catering and punch bowls.

The other portion control is: are you spending too many days in the burg sitting down to saucy dinners with lobbyists, while still collecting your mucho denero per diem (ok, so I mix Spanish and Latin, they're both romance languages, aren't they) and eating for free, and of course with us being the only state without a lobbying disclosure law, we dont know exactly how many bottles of wine accompany that porterhouse and baked potato.

If these fat guys: the Zugs and Stevensons, these complacent two decade guys, the LaGrottas and Belardis, if they were knocking on their doors and holding the open houses and town meetings, and taking the heat for their tough votes (or in the case of the property tax reform bill if you're a House Republican, NOT taking a vote), you'd still be knocking on doors and not the unemployment office, or anyway whirring up the printer with resumes to lobbying firms or former compatriots looking for a golden parachute do nothing job hiding somewhere in the vast legislative bureaucracy, and I admit to being a part of it, okay, but some of us work when we work, and some of us rebel against the word down on high from the powers that be, the PTB of the word trying to kowtow to their ever dwindling majorities.

Anyone choke on Perzel congratulating pre-pubescent Mark Harris, and how in the Hell ladies and gentlemen can a 21 year old be so adamantly conservative, where are they breeding these black-haired Aryans, suburban Buenos Aires in the Hitler Youth enclave? So the Pig Man, he says in the Inky to good ole Marky Boy, if he can read above the 8th grade level yet, that he's welcome under Johnny boy's ample wing, a vote for the status quo. What do you think the thin young man will answer? Daryl Melcalfe for speaker you say?

Over my cold, dead body...but...wouldn't it be fitting to twist the GOP back to the stone age of the early 1990s when they were last in the minority and remind them what it is like to watch the governing.

On the way over to my safe haven of the library, a Veedub sits idling at the corner when she should be green and going right on red. I didn't honk at her as I hate the noise pollution and I'm not about the rudeness, but I am behind her gesticulating wildly the universal sign language for turn you idiot, hoping that she takes a minute to put down her Virginia Slim and eye shadow to save me some gas and go and be green on the right turn on red. Wanting to pimp her ride flat with a Monty Python foot, as the Beemer idling next to me has a classic bumper sticker:

Some Village in Texas is Missing Its Idiot, above a new one for me, Mr. Yuk Smiley Face in the Center: Yuck Bush. Never has a president seemed to inspire such one liners on sticky plastic on metal. Dont remember anti-Reagan sentiments as profound and prolific, but then again, all of the Good Reagan Democrats were part of the line of ducks heading to the military buildup and red ink parade, similar to what we have now, the black ink of Mr. Clinton's presidency erased with new war spending...

but I digress as the gas fumes pollute the air: Short answer, I should have skated the 2.3 miles to the 'bary and saved the gas and sweated gallons so I could type at no one. But, this is the fate of a single man looking for someone to share gas with.

So I just dated myself in the 1980s, and in the 2000s, I am still left dating myself until Ms. Right comes along and proposes to me and lets me write my novel and get out from under the dunce cap dome under which I slave as a drone for the PTB. Later

The Bloodbath in PA

By my count, 197 of 228 possible incumbents (dont quote me, this is top of the head math, calculated, but dont quote me) wanted to keep their seats in the bloated 253-member Pennsylvania General Assembly. (How about a Constitutional Convention cutting that number in half - could save taxpayers millions in salaries for members and staff.)

Seventeen failed, 17 incumbent losses - including the top two Senate leaders, and minor House D leader and 5 committee chairmen from 3 R and 2 D. This is a slaughter of the powers that be. How can the newbies coming in, this rabble, vote for the existing leaders that lead them on this scary road that should not have been traveled, and was actually backtracked, but the leaves had already been trodden black...

What was 31 open seats, including a special election in the Philly area that flipped from R to D is now 47 - 42 House seats open and 5 Senate seats open, all 5 GOP. The margin in the Senate is a bloated 29-21 with the special election capturing one, and to make any headway to 25-25 parity, the Ds need to focus on the seats they can win.

In the House, the recapitulation is 109-94, Ds recently flipping a Pittsburgh seat and retaining a Philly seat in a special, 42 incumbents either retired voluntarily or were retired at the ballot box by a pissed off 22 percent of the electorate that bother to show up, a motivated core of voters out to exercise their Democratic rights to term limit their members by voting them out. Hundreds of years of legislative experience, and some very nice people, got their walking papers.

The Rs have more seats, and thus more to defend, and several seats are vulnerable to flippitation, having nominated in the primary an overly conservative person perhaps, who might not succeed in the general election. Some of these R-held seats lean liberal and vice versa. If I were the gov, that's where I'd pour in the money for the coattails, open seats and flippitation-prone areas.

This gov, the former philly mayor, was selfish in 2002, not donating to coattail races, and the R margin in the Legisalture actually INCREASED...he spent wildly in the primary as did now Senate candidate Casey, and both went negative, holding turnout to 25 percent - negative campaigning is known to drive down turnout.

Anyway, negative campaigning was cited in the Lebanon-based Senate seat that went with the opponent 2-1, despite 6-7 figures being spent by the incumbent, and a nasty last-minute attack ad was a turnoff to many teevee watchers.

Two seats in Pitsburgh could flip, as well as the requisite handful or so in the southeast, which is trending blue state in regional support for Rendell and Kerry in past even year elections, allowing the state to trend D in the big races, but not for Congress or state capitol races, while still splitting ticket and keeping in a dominantly GOP General Assembly and Congressional delegation. This trend may be reaching closure.

The NYTimes today runs an article about a conservative backlash, big spending government ousting incumbents, a band of brothers and sisters called Operation Clean Sweep sending six into the fray to knock off incumbents include a still breast-feeding 21 year old college student, barely old enough to drink, let alone vote, but vote he did, with denero and expertise from conservative kingmaker wannabe Jeff Coleman and his cronies who want to turn this into a religious enclave of some sort for righties...well, brother, this liberal Republican - and that is not an oxymoron - is not gonna trend that way, no way, so you watch it in November, the backlash commeth from the left - of your own part and the left of the other, for the Ds, perhaps reviled as the left hand of god, better get their act together, lest this opportunity slip through their fingies.

Even speculation that it might be better for Ds NOT to win, we're talking Congress here, to just go ahead and let the GOP wallow in misery for another two years to give mo to the 2008 presidential candidate. Dont do it, gain ground.

Anyway, I digress. Suffice it to say, it is NICE? to see some new faces in the fray, but who exactly is this rabble? Car salesmen and college students? Six Clean Sweepers took out incumbents and 23 made it from the band of 81 intendeds, with at least two independents looking for ballot room, but hey, what do I know? 25 percent seems to be the number of the moment...not bad, but please let fall turnout be high, and DONT sweep out the good legislators we have just to use the broom. They aren't all villains. Some actually go Hburg to legislate and deal in policy, not feather some nest in some fiefdom. Keep that in mind kiddies. Get out and vote.

Will Election Day Unincumbent Anyone?

So, I skateboarded down to my local church to vote in the rec hall and I met three other actual voters other than the election day staff that were there. There is an open seat for me to pick a new rep in and gee I was so glad to be a part of the process. The one candidate's daughters were there, very nice and enthusiastic, but their day allegedly had not voted in very many elections in the last decade. The front runner had an older gal electioneering, but I heard she lived on the West Shore and only now back in the district for 8 months.

Anyway, I asked what their position on abortion was and naturally they were both pro-life, and I was like, I guess I dont have a choice.

But there were two other candidates and I picked one of them, and I would've worked for one of them, but they were both from the upper end of the district and I dont think serious contenders.

I wrote in the pig guy for my R Lt. Gov. candidate. Oh, BTW, I found a site where it lists celebrity campaign contributions and I found out that Gov. Wannabe Swann donated some funds to Sen. John Kerry back in the mid-90s and I'm like if I was a member of the crash team for Rendell, and I could be if so motivated by the Cheesesteak King, I would run a commercial on that one come the fall, just to twist the sword in deeper in case Swannie Sacrificial Lamb wants to run for Congress someday.

It's all about the coattails baby.

Go challengers! Sweep em out, but dont let the system corrupt you when you're in.